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16-Jan-2017 01:33

Luckily there was a cooler full of beer waiting for us when we were finished.

The last half-hour of the event was dedicated to mingling and getting to know one another, though my coworker and I actually had to duck out about 20 minutes early. Overall my experience was a pretty positive one: The concept of speed workout dating is a great one, though I think the event could have been slightly better executed.

I’m not saying that I blamed myself for the unfair standards placed on women; I simply decided that there was only one variable I could control in these situations: how I reacted to the pressure to be "cool." So I slowly, but surely, began expressing my actual feelings around the men I was dating.

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It was a seriously alienating time — one in which I completely lost myself.

When I shared my realization with my parents, they confirmed that, sure, a lot of little boys liked girls who could hang.

"Some of them will grow out of it and realize they like girls like you," they assured me..

I was so concerned with living up to what I thought these guys wanted that I forgot who Maria was.

But around February of last year, I had an important realization that helped me start acting less like the Cool Girl and more like myself: The men weren’t the problem.

Confession time: After a long, drawn-out, and painful breakup, I have found myself recently single again.

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